May 15, 2012
I’ve never run out of gas in my car. Yet I always fill it up. I have no evidence that my car actually needs gas to run.
Tree surgeons abuse wordplay more than any occupation I can think of.
I bought a tv antenna in an attempt to get some channels in my bedroom. End result: 2 channels, PBS and NBC. Now my tv is always on NBC when I turn it on. I think this must be how Leno gets ratings.
Most of the time I spend on Facebook is spent resisting posting funny comments about people’s baby pictures.
I’m scared thinking about how much I’d be willing to pay for Starburst jelly beans without grape.
I always thought I’d have to make the movie about my life, but then I saw Tokyo Drift.
March 13, 2016
February 20, 2016