From the Notebook, Jan 14

Random thoughts that I remember to jot down …

I hate cutting open food packaging, only to discover later that the package is resealable.

I don’t like leaving my dishwasher door open all the way. I fear that I’ll wind up like Zach Braff’s mom in Garden State.

I think I should be on The Bachelor. It would be a vastly different show (I assume). I think half the show would be me negotiating with the producers about changes I want to make. There would be a QOTD each day and poor answers will result in immediate dismissal. There will also be trick roses. The whole show will be almost as complicated as Bamboozled. In fact, I bet I could get Matt LeBlanc to host.

I can’t believe that Modern Family has become so popular but Better Off Ted gets no ratings. To me, Better Off Ted was last year’s version of Modern Family. It was the show that my family would talk about every week. By some miracle (there must be someone with taste at ABC) they brought it back for another year. This season has been spectacular but I don’t know anyone outside my family who has watched it. Where The Office is a mock version of a small business, Better Off Ted is a satirical version of a huge corporation. In one episode this year, the corporation replaced the robot that cleans up spills with a janitor because the janitor was cheaper to maintain. The scientists were very upset that they were getting rid of a perfectly capable robot but were told the robot would be sent to a farm where it could do robot things.

In the office, a weight loss challenge has started. This used to happen at my old job. I really can’t stand it because the engineers stand around discussing ways they plan to lose weight. I don’t participate as I’d be throwing away $20. The other day I was walking behind someone who sits in the room here but I do not know. He is in a sling for some reason and someone else in the challenge was saying how, since he was injured, he wouldn’t be able to work out, so he probably wouldn’t win. Somehow I wound up next to him in one of those situations where I felt compelled to say something. I decided to say, ‘if they had to cut it off [referring to the arm in the sling], you’d probably win [the weight loss challenge].’ Made sense to me. You win if you lose the most % of your weight. An entire arm would be at least a couple of pounds. He seemed to agree but didn’t seem to find the idea as hilarious as I did in my head. The important part of this story is that I don’t know this guy, never talked to him before. Quite a first impression. This is why I usually filter myself until I get to know someone.